La Fiesta
Monday, May 29th, 2006
Archive for May, 2006
The 5th of Mayonnaise
Friday, May 5th, 2006
El Cinco de Mayonnaise is a national holiday in Mexico. It celebrates the victory of Mexican board game players against France in a long, drawn-out game of Riskâ„¢, the cause of the conflict.
Beginning in April, 1862, as an argument over whether or not it was better to use mayonnaise or Miracle Whipâ„¢ in an egg salad sandwich, it soon escalated into a full-scale food fight that resulted in the death of 40,000,000 people within the first few hours.
Diplomatic efforts by the President of Mexico, Cinco, and the president of France, Black Jacque Chirac, resulted in a temporary cease-fire and the beginnings of peace talks. These efforts did not go well, and almost resulted in the continuation of the food fight.
Cooler heads prevailed, and it was determined that the most fair way to resolve the dispute was a game of Riskâ„¢. The game itself took over 11 days to complete, with repeated accusations by the French that the dice were loaded.
Mexico prevailed on May 5th, and the French were forced to acknowledge (in writing) the superiority of mayonnaise.
